The Inner Circle
AA: We’d like to invite you to dinner. All the show moms like to get together before a show.
Me: That sounds nice! (I’ve only been showing at that barn for over a year, and suddenly NOW I’m invited???) What can I bring?
AA: (silence)
Me: (silence)
AA: Well, nothing, Lupe has taken care of everything and I’m making Pasta and salad.
Me: Lupe? I don’t know her. Does she show at our barn?
AA: My house lady.
Me: (House lady?? WTF?) How about I bring some wine? I really hate to show up empty-handed.
AA: (moment of silence) That would be fine. 7pm then?
Me: (um) We’ll see you then.
My feelings toward obligation usually outweigh my desire to avoid certain people. I hate snobbish rich wannabe modern day Asters. However, my daughter rides at this barn and shows with the daughters of these People. I hate the influence, yet, she loves riding. I don’t want my daughter to be ostracised from the group because I find them dull and pretentious. Auntie Mame keeps flitting through my head all through the dinner. I did find a couple of couples who aren’t offensive and kind of fun. It was a nice surprise. After the dinner, another couple invited us to dinner on another night.
My fear is in being the new toy, as I am not one of them and never was. These groups have a penchant for enjoying the gossip and drama of the “new” people. And as easily as I am brought in, I am just as easily discarded. Suburbia has a way of keeping you on your social toes
Tags: Auntie Mame, dinner among friends?, Wealthy suburbanites
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March 23, 2008 at 2:23 pm
I want a “house lady!” She could go to any potlucks in my place.
March 23, 2008 at 4:46 pm
Sounds fodder for John Cheever.
March 23, 2008 at 5:18 pm
Ick. I’ve been there.
March 23, 2008 at 7:51 pm
What parents have to do for their children eh? Good on ya!
Smart point about being gossip fodder. I don’t enjoy that either.
March 23, 2008 at 8:21 pm
They don’t know you yet, or how desireable you are. Please stop over at the blog, I have awards for you.
March 24, 2008 at 2:15 am
I know these people well because my daughter was a horse kid, too. But I never made it to their dinners because I was a single mom and therefore, probably a home wrecker.
It worked out pretty well, actually.
March 24, 2008 at 5:43 am
Gossip fodder? Ick.
hopefully, they aren’t all elitist snobs.
March 24, 2008 at 6:30 am
Hi Meno:
It seems Lupe is everything, cook, maid, caretaker, nanny… Everything. Not sure I could have one, unless they were related, then it’d be okay.
Hi Matt:
You know, it does. Time to go reread some good fodder!
Hi Em:
How did you escape, what is the secret??
Hi Carrie:
Ah, all in a day, or evenings work!! hehe. Not sure how many do enjoy being actual gossip. I can only hope I’ve pegged these people wrong and that my asshole radar faultered.
Hi CEO:
Lets keep the not knowing going for a while. Once they hang out with me for a while, the real me eventually will come out and then BINGO - they will either love me or discard me. Happens everywhere I go. Thanks for the awards!! Also, I’m anonymous. Shhhhhh.
Hi Heart:
Is that the trick? I need to get rid of Poor Bill? Hmmmmmmm… Nah, I can’t do that. But I can flirt, maybe that would scare them away?
Hi Rachel:
I’m very hopeful. What I think is that they are mostly new money elitist snobs and there is a decent bone in their body that their poorer upbringing left behind. I’m hoping!!
March 24, 2008 at 7:31 am
Yup. I’m a selfish bitch. If I don’t like the parents, I ain’t going, no matter what the social consequences for my children. Plenty of other friends to be had.
March 24, 2008 at 10:01 am
How did you not use the c word when she said “house lady”?!!?
March 24, 2008 at 10:32 am
Hi Franki:
I know, I know, I’m an asshole and a whimpy one at that. I give a bad name to assholes everywhere.
Hi Asterisk:
I was in shock. I mean, really, who says house lady???
March 24, 2008 at 8:59 pm
I’m giggling at the thought of Auntie Mame - how did you keep your composure?
March 25, 2008 at 3:39 am
first of all that ’silence’ would have sent my alarm bells off, that whole set though can smack of elitism and arrogance - Im sure you will be on your guard with that lot.. I would be dreading it myself..
March 25, 2008 at 6:42 am
Well, you could always document their bad behaviour and then publish it. Think of yourself as a modern day F. Scott Fitzgerald.
Puss
March 25, 2008 at 10:18 am
Hi Gardenia:
Lets see. I started with white wine, moved up to red wine then continued full steam with a martini. I think next time I’ll just take an ativan.
Hi Judith:
That silence did set off MAJOR alarm bells. Fortunately we don’t show that much and won’t be going to too many of these. Now, those couples I did meet, they stand a good chance of becoming aquaintences.
Hi Glam:
Between them and the League I belonged to, I could write a mad spell. However, I would need an amazing editor and someone to pay me.
March 25, 2008 at 10:23 am
The things we do for our kids…
March 25, 2008 at 10:34 am
Hi Dawn:
I know! the little buggers!
March 25, 2008 at 4:20 pm
Whoa, chica. I actually feel like I just watched a little movie, reading this post. It’s really hard for me to remember that people like this still exist; it feels so 1950’s in a way.
Plus, I don’t hang with any richies.
March 26, 2008 at 12:43 am
Sounds very stepford wives to me but I’ll all for realistic sex dolls.
March 26, 2008 at 6:06 am
Hi Jocelyn:
Oh, it gets worse. These are just the touchables. The untouchables aren’t so suburban.
Hi Knudsie:
Yes, very stepford. Except these dolls have cellulite.
March 26, 2008 at 2:18 pm
i adore auntie mame!
and i don’t know how i would have responded either. i can totally be a reverse snob sometimes.
i hope the dinner turned out to be an enjoyable experience nonetheless
March 30, 2008 at 7:57 pm
Oh, my. Good luck with this. Hope you don’t have to suck it up too much for your dear daughter’s sake. (Though having just sat through one of *the* worst theatre performances I have ever endured — scratch that — the worst, I feel your pain — at least some of it.) Good luck, my friend.